Re-reading my last entry caused some somewhat uninvited light to be thrown onto the subject of me and the males of our species. One thing I absolutely admire about a couple of my closest female friends is their ability to maintain successful friendships with members of the opposite sex. It seems I distinctly lack expertise in this field. Infact, I am absolutely appalling at it. I would sincerely like to have close male friends. Don’t get me wrong I have a few and I love them all to bits. Plus, at heart, I’m a bit of a bloke myself. I could talk for hours about football, formula 1 racing or any other ‘manly’ sport deemed to intense for women. I could happily articulate my opinions on the latest sports car and am an actual james bond fanatic. Girly talk doesn’t interest me. I think herein lies my problem. Try to follow – I have no difficulty in striking up a conversation with a man, or getting along with them, because excluding the occasional psychopath I have a great deal in common with the average male. I have therefore concluded that my lack of close male friendships is caused by me inadvertently crossing ‘that line’ between being friendly and flirting. I have deduced that most men I meet consider me either a possible girlfriend or someone they wouldn’t be interested in pursuing as a girlfriend but as am obviously coming onto them they must escape and remove any possibility of a friendship blossoming. Of the few actual male friends (not acquaintances) that I have, two are ex-boyfriends and most of the others friends of theirs. Well, clearly I must address this issue in order for to me to acquire a whole host of non-female friends.
The problem stems from me thinking I’m being friendly and they thinking I fancy them. Cue research and cue solution:
15minutes later- success:

1) Do not offer a male acquaintance food- apparently a no-go as is very sexual, his mouth is going to be where mine was! Fair enough.
2) No longer end text messages with ‘xxx’. Women put kisses at the end of everything and men see them as a sign that you’re interested. Mental note to refrain from doing this in future as am indeed guilty.
3) Hmmm, again guilty. Terms of endearment that I use in everyday speech such as ‘sweetie’ and ‘babes’ should infact be avoided as can be misconstrued as interest. Oops- I certainly see where have been going wrong.
4) When it comes to being tactile some women just can’t help themselves and lord knows I’m one of them. Females, including myself, tend to touch a lot, and you’ve guessed it, tis in no uncertain terms a bad idea. It would seem that nothing bonds two people better than a touch. Hands to yourself Joey, even if it makes telling your story far less interesting!

A plan of action I think. Follow above points and watch all future male acquaintances become life long friends. Or near enough. If I adhere to my proposed strategy to the letter there will be no excuse for everybody with an adams apple to attempt to insert his tongue into my mouth. Because if I’m honest I think I must subconsciously encourage it. I’m just an accidental flirt.

Joey~X~